chasing Francis

This is not a post about chasing our youth intern Francis Becknell around the church!  This is about the book entitled "Chasing Francis" by Ian Cron.  I picked it up after hearing Ian speak at the Creative Conference in April.  I'll get to the heart of the book in a second.

First, a refresher.  Ian was the first speaker at the Creative Conference which I attended last month.  He was authentic, genuine.  He came across as one of those people who asks you a question, peering directly into your eyes, completely focused on you as they await your response, as if you were the most important person in the world to them.  Ian was like that.

We never talked one-on-one, so it's not like I got to interact with him in this way.  It's just that when he spoke, he was real, open; you got the feeling that he had been drinking from a deep well of Living Water and it made you want to say, "Where is this water?  How can I get some?"

He charged us to befriend silence, to behold God and have God behold us.  Why is this such a foreign concept to me?  I know very little of what it means to behold.  All these years of being a Christian and I'm still like a squirming, wriggling toddler in God's arms.  I connect with Him ever so briefly and then I run off to do other things.  I think this is why Ian's talk made such a big impression on me.  It reminded me that I walk around desperately thirsty, parched, actually.  And all along there is a bottomless well, easily within reach, that I could drink from frequently and liberally.

"Chasing Francis" is a fictional account of a preacher who goes on a pilgrimage of sorts, trying to find that well, after years of having lost his way.  He is seeking to learn from the life of St. Francis of Assisi.  I need Francis, too.  I need to learn and re-learn what it means to seek God, to sit at His feet, and to drink deeply from the Living Water that can quench like no other.

"I'm here if you're here"

"I'm here if you're here."  "I'm here."
At the "God still speaks" Creative Conference, speaker Ian Cron had us take a moment to introduce ourselves to our neighbor, while making a commitment to be present. He had us speak the words above to each other, taking turns with the lead line "I'm here if you're here."  I needed this exercise (actually, Ian called it an African prayer) desperately.  I know I could benefit from this prayer every day.

We are not used to being present these days. We are constantly emailing, texting, posting, tweeting.  I say "we" but I mean "me".  I long for connection and think that digital media and social networking sites will take me there.  But where exactly is "there"?  In the frenzy of seeking connections with others, I remove myself from where I am, in reality.

I text during meetings, check emails at stoplights, post pictures on FB---all the while marveling at my gift for multi-tasking.  But I'm not a high-powered CEO needing to make important decisions that will affect the direction of my company.  What's driving me? Like others, I think I mistake the virtual connection for a real one.  Online I think I'm getting the real "meat" of a relationship when, in truth, I'm ending up with "pink slime", if you will!

A powerful video I just watched speaks to this truth.  Speaker Sherry Turkle discusses how fragmented we are in today's digital age. I am, as Paul said it, chief among sinners when it comes to such things.  I actually checked my email during the video and posted a comment! :P Though Sherry doesn't speak about connection with God, what she said convicted me and resonated with what Ian was speaking about the conference.  We need to develop stillness, and a willingness to be alone and silent in an age that is go-go-go and noise-noise-noise.  We need to re-learn how to focus, so that we can be present with God and others.

Watch this video and let me know your thoughts.  Is Sherry being overly pessimistic or does it ring true to you?  And if any of you have found ways to unplug from virtual things and connect with real life, please comment.  I need all the help I can get!  

introductions

She grabbed my hand and looked into my eyes.  Earnestly, she encouraged me to say "yes" to God, to use the talents God had given me.  I had just met this woman some 10 minutes before, and yet she was talking to me as if we had been friends for years!  Jorden was just one of many folks I met in Tennessee last week, but she was definitely the warmest.  I appreciated that, because I went down there not knowing a soul.

Half the time at the conference, I was feeling insecure, uncertain, wondering if I would meet anyone, learn anything.  I knew it was sink or swim, socially, so I decided to be bold and make every effort to initiate connections with other worship leaders and songwriters.  I would randomly initiate conversations with people around me, with varying degrees of success.  I felt like a guy at a bar with bad pick-up lines. :}  I introduced myself to one lady who looked like a blonde Southern Belle who sips sweet tea and buys only Mary Kay makeup.  (Her complexion was very clear and unlined, to her credit.) "Hi," I said, pulling up a chair to her table in the cafe, "My goal is to meet as many people as possible at this conference."  She looked startled.  (I guess people in the south prefer to be properly introduced and, certainly, no one just plops down at someone else's table, uninvited.)  

Between workshops, I was walking in the hall and ran into a woman trying to find the restroom.  She had reddish hair and reminded me of a woman named Carol who works for Body and Soul.  When I asked her her name, she acted a bit skittish and said, "Jen" and then moved away.  I realized that evening in worship that it was Jennie Lee Riddle, the woman who wrote "Revelation song"!  (She probably thought I was going to hound her for her autograph or something.  And, actually, I just might have.)

I did feel a bit stalker-ish when I met Meredith Andrews, and asked for her picture.  :)  But truly she was so genuine and sweet, as she and her husband led the workshop, I had to approach her afterward.  (Plus I knew that folks on my team would love to see that we met----we sing a lot of her songs in worship:  "We are", "The new song we sing" and "You're not alone".)

"Introductions" is a perfect title for this post, because I am only barely beginning to tell you what happened down in Nashville.  I can't wait to get to the meat of what happened.  Just consider this a "Cinco de Mayo" appetizer! ;)

drinking water from a fire hydrant

"Drinking water from a fire hydrant"--this is one of the malapropisms that came from a speaker at the Creative Conference in Nashville.  He was talking about all of the information and ideas that were coming at those in attendance and I think he meant to say that it was like "drinking from a fire hose" but he used a different noun.  It didn't matter.  We laughed just the same.  We knew what he meant, because we were experiencing it.

At the conference, I became inundated with water from the hydrant, if you will!  So many good ideas, songs, and thoughts were thrown my way.  We were ably led by the best speakers and musicians---all of whom were prodding us to wake from our complacency in our walks with God and our ministries.  

I went on the conference with exactly this in mind.  I wanted a wake up call---actually, a call, period.  I wanted to be reminded of my purpose and calling and continue equipping myself to pursue it with a whole heart.  I came away with thoughts on the above, and then some.  After I comb through my notes, I'll share some of what I gleaned in future blogs.

But now comes the hard part---how to translate what I've received, into concrete action steps.  Happily, I'm reading a book entitled "Switch:  How to change things when change is hard."  It's all about practical tips to bring about change.

Here's how it's playing out so far:

fresh thoughts + powerful ideas + great worship + new connections  = an overwhelmed me

Here's how I hope it plays out:

 thoughts + ideas + worship + connections + reliance on God's Spirit > status quo 

Any fire starts with a spark.  Mine might just have been this conference.  I'm going to fan the flames with time on my knees.   I want the water (whatever its provenance) to catch fire with the Holy Spirit's help.  I want it to result in a contagious conflagration for God, in me and the church.  

solitary confinement?

"It is not good for man to be alone."  Being alone.  This was the first thing in all of creation that God said wasn't good.  Before making that declaration, He was on a roll.  God made the light and saw that it was good.  He made sea and land and saw that it was good.  And so on.  Yup, just about everything was good.  No, actually, EVERYTHING was good.
With this one exception.

Sin hadn't yet entered the world, so it's not like sin made it not good.  (Not yet, anyway.)  Something was missing.

God designed us to be connected, to Him, of course.  But even that uninterrupted, unhindered connection with God somehow wasn't good. Or at least, it wasn't good enough.

I've been thinking about this lately because my stepfather passed away and now my mom is living on her own.  She's never lived alone, not in her entire life.  To her (and to me), it seems...well, lonely.  And not good.

Jobs v. Jesus

Steve Jobs dressed up as Jesus one Halloween.  He probably did it tongue-in-cheek, but it's hard to know for sure. Steve had a "reality distortion field", as friends described it.  He would put his own spin on the truth, and he was so charismatic at times, that he could often persuade others to buy into "his reality", too.  This I learned from  "Steve Jobs" by Walter Isaacson.  During Lent, I've been reading the gospels, and this biography at the same time.  It's been fascinating, and a study in contrasts.

Jobs' adoptive parents did everything they could to make him feel special.  He had a bright mind and caught on to lessons in school and at home quickly.  He developed an "I can do anything" kind of spirit.  But, perhaps, a subconscious feeling of abandonment from his birth parents shaped him, as well.  In relationships, he was distant and difficult.  He seemed to prefer concepts to people and would often get captivated, or obsessed by certain ideas.  He sought enlightenment through Eastern mysticism, culminating in a trek to India as a young man to find a "spiritual guide". But his spiritual pursuits did not change his character.  He was ambitious and narcissistic, caustic and cruel with those around him, colleagues and friends, alike.  He would berate their work and show little affection, being oddly cold at times.

He founded a company called Apple and the products they released--including the Mac, Ipod, Iphone, Ipad--started a tech revolution that changed the way consumers related to technology and even one another.  Jobs apparently reached his lofty goal of making a "dent in the universe".

Jesus walked the earth over 2000 years ago.  He made a dent in the universe of a different kind.  An eternal, life-changing kind.

Jesus was adopted, too (in a way).  He was born of a virgin, from a heavenly Father.  His earthly parents knew he was special from before he was born.  As a young man, he astounded teachers in the temple, and when his ministry began in earnest, at about 30 years of age, people were in wonder and began to follow this worker of miracles.  They followed Him, not because of His charisma, but because He pointed the way to God, in a way no one had ever done before.  He spoke "as one with authority" and treated those around Him with love and kindness.  He healed.  He loved.  He inspired.

He made outrageous claims, but not in an arrogant way.  "I am the Bread of life."   "I am the Light of the world."  "I am the Good Shepherd," He said.  And He proved it by laying down His life for His sheep.  His death revolutionized the way we relate to one another and to God.  He died that we might live.  But that was just the beginning of the dent on the universe!  He fulfilled His bold claim "I am the resurrection and the life" by rising on the third day.

Victory over death v. victory over Microsoft
A man who thought he was God's gift to the world v. God's Gift to the world
A man with his own version of the truth, who tried to find a way to improve life v.
the "Way, the Truth, and the Life"

No contest, right?

sinful woman

Tears on Your feet

wiped with my hair

overwhelmed by feelings

How do I dare

approach the One

who knows no sin

yet knows exactly

where my heart has been

I cry, no, sob

suffocated by dark

afraid of the ugliest

parts of my heart

Some think they know

who I am, what I’ve done

they’ve no idea

what I’m capable of

At your feet

I weep and bow

kiss and bless

not caring how

their eyes may pierce

their tongues may wag

they fade away

before You now

I meet your eyes

feel warmth and peace

light penetrates

gray parts of me

flooding love

fills every space

it’s something new

this spreading grace

I’m such a mess

I can’t conceive

Yet found by You

I now can breathe

You love me most

You know me best

No longer alone

I’m your beautiful mess